That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just want nice things and good sex
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
