I accidentally had phone sex last night
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
