States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
