And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
