Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize