I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
