i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Randomize
