Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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