hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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