thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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