I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
