New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
