When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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