Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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