so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
