So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
