You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
The struggles of a small town man whore
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
