i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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