I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
