i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
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