One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
