BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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