every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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