i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
He better not be in your backpack
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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