its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
