so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
