i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
