fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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