when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
