I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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