Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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