God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
