She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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