just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
