That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
