I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
