he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
