I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
