I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
