Christians are straight up FREAKS
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
You were trust falling into bushes
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
