Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
