dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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