Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I have post one night stand depression
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