I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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