forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
