He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize
