thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Randomize
