I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
