you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
