READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
